Tamara Fernandez

“I’m not perfect, but I’m enough” – Carl Rogers.

So many people deal with feelings of not being enough, of never measuring up. This is often something that has been absorbed during childhood, either due to neglect, abuse, or unrealistic expectations and pressures put on you from a young age. As you have grown up, you may often have the feeling that there is always more to do and you can end up feeling like no matter how hard you try, you’re falling short. This can be especially true if you are a new parent yourself or living in a multi-generational home and caring for elderly loved ones.

I offer support from a trauma informed perspective as a parent and a caregiver to relatives myself; but also as someone who has experienced trauma Self care and self compassion can feel like simple social media catch phrases, but learning to set boundaries, and to know when good enough is really good enough, can help with managing burnout and healing from trauma and trauma symptoms like anxiety, depression, low self worth.

Many factors contributed to my passion to become a therapist, including immigrating to Canada, grief over lost friends, identity and cultural adjustment; and having lived experience as well as seeing loved ones struggle with trauma.

Growing up in the 90’s in India; therapy was mostly viewed as taboo. We had very limited access to therapy or mental health professionals and there wasn’t much help available for people who were struggling. I became a therapist in part to provide the support that my friends and I could have used in our formative years. One friend in particular suffered the impact of trauma. Seeing her struggle and wishing I had the right skills to help her, motivated me to study psychology and sparked my interest in counselling in general and in EMDR specifically.

I have (and continue to see) a therapist for personal and relationship challenges, and I know that I can be the best version of myself as a person, parent, and partner to my spouse because of it. The positive impact can be seen in my interactions with others, compassion towards self, and my love for life. I know how important making time to refill my own resources is and I appreciate getting the opportunity to check in with my therapist for support in my own life.

When you start taking steps towards improving your mental health, you can end up finding fulfilment and joy in most aspects of your life!

If what I’ve shared here has connected with you, reach out for a consultation. I look forward to walking with you on your journey of healing and well-being.